抱怨的背後—-以弗所書5:33［然而, 你們各人都當愛妻子, 如同愛自己一樣. 妻子也當敬重她的丈夫.］丈夫説話通常是為了達到某種目的, 是用來發表意見, 交待事情, 解決問題. 很少説自己, 與妻子説話是截然不同的. 因為妻子她需要説出來, 説出她的心情感受. 她不是在責怪你, 而是在紓解. 你如果不同意, 反對她的感受想法, 你解釋講道理就好像火山就耍爆發了, 你硬是把它塞住堵住. 她出不來在裡面的東西, 會更加的翻騰. 丈夫以為解釋了, 你就知道啊！我不是故意的. 我不是這樣做, 我沒有那樣做. 有那麼嚴重嗎？我們以為我們的解釋, 會讓對方停止責怪. 當我們越保護自己越解釋, 對方的情緒就越低落. 因為你的解釋, 就是沒有接納認同她的感受, 沒有支持她的感受. 你是在告訴她小題大作, 你不應該有這樣的感覺. 你是在否定壓抑她的感覺. 這樣夫妻的不同, 帶來夫妻溝通很大的落差. 丈夫們！你們一定要瞭解妻子的需要, 要表達你對她真正的愛. 她可愛的時候你要愛她, 她不可愛的時候你也要愛她.
Behind the Complaint – Ephesians 5:33 [However, each of you should love his wife as himself. A wife should also respect her husband.] A husband usually speaks for some purpose, using Come to express opinions, explain things, and solve problems. Talking to your wife is very different from talking about yourself. Because the wife needs to speak up and express her feelings. She is not blaming you, but relieving. You If you disagree and disagree with her feelings and thoughts, you explain and reason as if a volcano is about to erupt, and you just plug it up. What she can’t get out of will be even more tumultuous. The husband thinks it’s explained, You know it! I didn’t mean to. I didn’t do it, I didn’t do that. Is it that serious? We thought that our explanation would make the other person stop blaming. The more we protect ourselves and the more we explain, the lower the other person’s mood will be. Because your explanation is not accepting and agreeing with her feelings, and not supporting her feelings. You are telling She is making a fuss, you shouldn’t feel this way. You are denying and suppressing her feelings. This difference between husband and wife brings a big gap in communication between husband and wife. Husbands! You must understand your wife’s needs and express your true love for her. Love her when she’s cute and love her when she’s not.